Interview With Rick from Dirty Drag

This is just a fun little mock interview I wrote up, mostly so I could get in Ricks’s head. I wrote this at the end of Dirty Drag 2 so this is where I hypothetically see Rick’s mind-space at the conclusion of Drag 2.

Me: “So Rick, why exactly do you like Ashley?” It’s a tough opening question, but I don’t want to beat around the bush, and we both know what this interviews really about.

Rick: “Why do I like Ashley? That’s easy. One,” he held up one finger, “He’s sexy as sin. I know that probably shouldn’t be the top reason, but come on, I’m a man with needs, and Ashley’s hot body more than satisfies those hankerings.”

Holding up another finger, Rick continued, “He’s sharp, quick-witted, you never know what Ashley’s tongue might say or do. You know his tongue is pierced, and just thinking about it makes me—” He gave an impish grin, but didn’t finish his thought before holding up a third finger.

“He keeps me on my toes. This kind of goes with the previous reason, but I like the surprises and never knowing what to expect. I don’t have to worry about Ashley boring me.”

He raised a fourth finger, “I know Ashley seems sarcastic and snarky, but those are just lines and only one of many layers. I’m looking forward to peeling back all of his layers. I’m a patient man though and don’t mind the wait. I like earning my rewards, and it’s not like it’s a hardship getting to know Ashley more intimately.” Rick’s grin was back.

“He makes me laugh,” Rick said, adding his thumb to his other four fingers. “And a man who keeps me laughing is a keeper. And the sixth the reason,” he put his hand down. “That ass! I already said that, but it’s worth repeating.”

Me: “I see you’ve thought about this before.”

Rick: “You kidding? He’s pretty much all I think about.”

Me: “Interesting.” I say in my eerily sinister echoey voice.

Rick: “Now I have a question for you, Mr. Adams.” He leaned forward and gave me a look that dared me to try and say no.

Me: “A question for me, really? I never saw this coming, it’s so unexpected. I guess we could try that, since you asked so politely.”

Rick: “You ever planning to finish writing mine and Ashley’s story?”

Me: You know Rick, I might just do that.”



  1. I am so going to sick the sloths on you, buddy! How will I ever sleep again, not knowing if Ashley is able to rescue his boob from the evil empire of boobnappers? If I start looking like the walking dead it's all on you Kyle.

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